I'm ready to go home. But I simultaneously never want to leave. I like this non-reality. I'm afraid to return to reality. But at the same time, I know I need to. I know it's time to. I miss my family and home. And I kinda miss some things about America, mostly that people aren't racist like they are here. Or if they are, they know that they can't be very open about it like they are here. I'm not saying we don't have problems in America. But come here for a while and you'll appreciate home SO MUCH MORE.
One day while I was bored, I made three lists. Lists about going home. First, I made a list of the things I miss about home. THen I made a list of things I'm going to miss about South Africa. Then finally I made a list of things I'm going to try to bring back home.
1) Things I miss:
- American TV
- American radio (especially country music)
- English (I feel left out a lot of the times)
- Mexican food (Chipotle, get at me!)
- My parents
- Tiger Lily (my cat)
- Tipsy & Duchess (my dogs)
- friends
- not having to explain myself everywhere I go all the time...some things I do I guess are just so American
- not having to say hello! No I'm not South African, I'm American. I'm from Chicago (if I say Kansas they just not and smile like ok...), I'm studying abroad in South Africa for a few months....etc
- not having to justify why beef jerky is better than biltong
- HOME
- hugs (haven't had one in ages)
- slightly less racist society
- my car
- on that note, driving
- my phone
2) Things I'm going to miss:
- rhinos
- dogs, particularly this one on my lap
- the Wildcat (she's so sweet and cuddly)
- this family I'm staying with
- the friends I made here, especially Thurstan and Dillan.
- being able to order a beer or glass of wine
- rusks (South Africa's version of biscotti, but somehow better)
- tea
- beauty everywhere I look
- all the really nice friendly people I've met here
- the pace of life...it's just slower (people tell me they can tell I'm American from afar by the speed at which I walk!)
- easy airport security
- dividing prices by 10. 1 US Dollar = 10 ZARand...has been kinda nice
- 85 degree winter days
- when 35˚ means it's hot, not cold (still not used to Celsius...)
3) Things I'm going to try to bring back:
- openness of mind and heart
- seeing the beauty everywhere - because honestly there is beauty in everything, and sometimes it's easy to forget that closest to home.
- being excited about lots of things
- being open about talking about things like racial, political, cultural, or religious differences
- boboetie and rusks (not sure about the latter...or the former really, but I'm gonna try)
- better awareness of how to serve well
- new friendships with people at NU
- self-sufficiency (27 days without financial resources...yeah, I didn't think I had it in me! But it is nice when we surprise ourselves by being stronger than we think we are)
- acceptance of living without some things. For some reason, I think getting my purse stolen in the States would have been more stressful.
- journaling
- eagerness to learn from everyone I meet. appreciating differences.
- This little wildcat. I think Lily needs a friend... This cat is way cuter than NU's mascot Willie the wildcat (cough cough). And she'll fit in my carry-on luggage. Ben already said I could have her when I asked. I think he thought I was kidding...
No comments:
Post a Comment